"Easy, Not on My Watch!"

 

When it comes to choosing the degree of difficulty you play the game on, do you sometimes feel as if you're cheating if you select easy, kind of like you're taking the wussy way out. We all know it's not that big of a deal, it's all about having fun (right), but I just can't help to feel as if I'm the dweeby kid on the beach who gets sand kicked in his face by some big buff dude who steals my girlfriend if I chose the easy setting.

 

What makes it even more humiliating is the trophy/achievement system they have in place now, because when your friends check out your virtual accomplishments they can clearly see that you punked and took the easy way out. These trophies/achievements always have the worst names too...like " Come back and try again when your balls drop"...which makes you feel even worse and less of a man.

 

At least back in the day before they implemented this system, you could boast with confidence that you beat the game on the hardest difficulty setting knowing they could never really find out...like the kid in the locker room who's claimed to have banged just about every fine honey around, when in all reality the closest he's even gotten with a woman is when he dressed his hand up in his sister's Barbie clothes.

 

Now I am not as good as I once was, and according to my girlfriend I can barely change out a roll of toilet paper without any complications...so I dare not choose any setting above normal. I don't claim to be a badass and I'm smart enough to know that normal is going to wreck me, so I'm not going to make things harder on myself than they need to be by trying to go above the normal setting...but I'm just not ready to choose easy.

 

First comes having to play on the easy difficulty setting, then the next thing you know, you're popping Viagra just like they were Pez. It makes you feel less masculine...like as if you're the kid in school who prefers home ec over wood shop.

 

MJM